Skeletons

You slept with skeletons 

and I still wake up with dismissive attention 

You beg for forgiveness 

but you're being forgotten 

you were too intoxicated to see 

anything other than

those desolated days you lived in

time can only tell 

but you're still dragging me into a fog 

you left me in hollywood

yearning and writing on empty walls

i'm wasting my mind 

because you decided on the one you left behind

your mind was confined 

and I still have that sick twisted smile

due to the anticipation of your yearning

I thought i’d be here for the rest of my life

but I’m gone so here’s your kiss goodbye. 

Venomous silk

Shattered faith

On broken wine glasses

Emotions revealed in black and white

Starting fights

To keep the numbing out

Listening to the white noise

From frequencies of heart beats

It's the sweaty palms

That make it hard to hold on

With eyes burning like fire

Tears neglected

To remind the soul of the journey

That's to come

of what's left to fight

And that's not to leave

An erratic route of

Unwillingness

Obsession

Delirious

Compulsion

Manifested

Empowerment

A bestowal of uncanny blessings

Sent from an angel

Who's fallen

Once or twice

And has obtained such venomous lips

Yet, determined and capable

in delivering such a silky kiss.

Confessions on eggshells

I wanted to be with you 

Until I really saw you,

that is, until I let you in.

And then, I realized 

I didn't want to be your dream girl,

The one walking on eggshells 

within the yolk of all that I am, 

all that I was, and will be 

trying to be careful not to wake you

from the state of reality that you reside in.

I'm far too wild for that.

My favorite form of reality is love,

the altered state of it

and you, fire,

me, water, 

We start a chain reaction 

with our thoughts 

and it's never a good one;

because you say talk is cheap 

but you fail to enunciate. 

El nino

I remember that night 

The night it decided to rain 

A thunderstorm you could say 

We stood there in our own little paradox 

An ice chest full of warmth 

We latched on to each others ugliness 

Because it was a friendly reminder 

That even the ugly can love and be loved 

Be so desperately desired 

And able to desire so desperately 

We needed to hear the answers

Our questions revealed to us 

And now 

The rain has stopped 

California in a drought 

We're somewhere in between 

Love and abuse 

A silver lining of what was 

And what twill be 

A melting pot of the past, the new and the used 

They're tempting us to join their teams 

The gray and the happy 

I watch the work of my words define me 

The words that fight till the end 

And you, babe, my perfect punching bag 

I've got one hand on your heart 

And my wine all over the floor 

You asked me to turn up the volume

to keep the white noise out

I told you that it was 

"The silence of the vinyl that touches the soul"

I wish I didn't have to 

But I told you so

And if I'm not already gone 

Ive got one foot out of the door 

it wasn't me 

it never was 

it was you

I would travel the world to find

And I’d run with my dreams just to have them in time

”Yes, I’ll go over but honey, what did you have in mind?”

What will you make me do?

When we pass the time will we waste it?

 I’m okay with whatever comes from this.

Through passionate times He turned water into wine.

I’ve come to find

That you can’t learn by standing in the line.

No fixed destination lets follow the blank sign.

 Don’t listen too closely to what they say

They’ll just try to kill you on your way.

My only advice is: 

Misery loves company, whatever you do, don't join in.

Take off your mask I want to see your face,

Intrigue my mind because I love the taste.

This town will offer many things.

But don’t stay long enough to see what it brings.

Lets go get high;

 It’s all that’s promising.

Your heart must beat for you

 And mine for mine
and we together we'll share the time. 

I just want to hear your story.

You’re either with me- or you’re leaving me.

 I don’t mind standing alone.

 I want you by my side but I can get there on my own.

So listen closely now, baby,

I promise this kind of life is hard to find.

Leave all of the comfort you once knew, behind.

 People search the world to be free,

Close your eyes so that you can clearly see.

I don’t think you know just how beautiful you are

 Something so simple shouldn’t be so hard.

With two feet in you’ll set the tone.

Lets follow our souls and walk each other home

Revelation

An aimless spirit, a lingering soul,

one that doesn't let me sleep

 One that raises many questions
with thoughts that can't speak

& blurs the vision I use to see

questions in which I don't need answered 

or can't answer

          I wasn't always this way

 it was simply a dream 

To live freely without a specific destination 

for the future is a revelation 

only a mouth full of experiences

a heart with beautiful told secrets

 and many feelings to sing 

         I have an appetite to be intimate with myself and you 

& to continuously achieve autonomy 

Convincing ourselves that we are worthy 

Hopefully, you listen to the body I use to speak 

A tongue that does the walking 

         Wont you dispel the myths of being poor 

because I see a survivor

a strumming hero with great stories

because we all know that I could get lost in your tongue

I want to know your story 

& where you come from 

Dispel your myths of suffering 

because I see strength

from every lesson you've kept

         Last night is this morning

and you're glistening

 It's the present and were living 

Im afraid too

but we build the bridges as we walk that way

and sing the songs were to afraid to say

Yes, No, Maybe so

For all of my dreams to come true, i’d crawl

awake at night watching my thoughts, just like particles, fall 

My parents instilled the art of praying if I wanted a real change 

so for a second I thought, damn, I may need to be saved

through the binoculars you say I’m insane 

but under my finger tips I found my escape 

my eyes wide open as my heart beat tells my brain

wanting something greater than the sounds of the trains

that i heard at night when all of the world was asleep 

while the moon beautifully awaits the sun as she silently weeps

for it to come back 

like a lost dream that fell into the cracks

or a lost puppy looking for some facts

X 

there were so many days just wasted 

being lost and jaded 

impatient and frustrated 

loving something tainted 

getting so dismayed 

driving in the vehicle & wondering if i should just wreck it

Words from my heart do you fear it or do you feel it?

writing things down needing someone to hear it

X

Found something so speakable 

now we’re doing the unspeakable 

talking about the “unreachable” 

sipping on our wine as we plan for the unthinkable

making it about purpose because life in itself is not meaningful

every morning is anything but dreadful 

because i’d give my life for the truth 

and that’s the truth 

crawling to the top but starting at the roof